MESSAGE from ERIK ROLFSEN, Vancouver BC Aug 15, 2022
This was my dad.
He once said he wouldn’t want to live if he couldn’t ride his bike anymore, and recently that day came. So Dad went.
He was born on a farm in Rimbey, Alta., raised in Nanaimo, and studied architecture at UBC. He bounced around Europe in a VW camper van with my late mom and then-newborn brother for a couple of years, then returned to North America and became the first Canadian to earn a doctorate degree in architecture. That’s why I was born in Ann Arbor.
Dad designed the house we grew up in on West 12th Avenue. He designed the house his granddaughters are growing up in on West 20th. And he designed the apartment he died in on Monday in Lunenburg, NS.
Those are his works that I’m most familiar with, but he and his long-time partner Kaien Shimizu also led the research for Phase 1 of Whistler Village and the master plan for Pacific Spirit Regional Park, among many other projects.
We were a bit alike. Dad was tall and had big feet and played some rugby and loved cycling. But he never had the same aversion to meetings that I do. He liked to get involved. He was president of his high school student council and later the Architectural Institute of B.C. When I was a kid, he would dash out to chair meetings of the Point Grey NDP. He was on a panel that selected the winning design for the Vancouver Public Library (a dissenting voice, it should be noted).
He retired to Lunenburg with my stepmom in 2000. It was good timing for the town, because a few years later they got a rare opportunity to re-imagine their waterfront when a huge swath of industrial property became available. Dad served for more than a decade on the local steering committee that guided the redevelopment.
You might have seen a photo of me kicking back in a public Adirondack chair on the Zwicker Wharf while visiting Lunenburg a couple of weeks ago. Just out of the frame were a dozen other such chairs, filled with families enjoying ice cream and the setting sun—all part of the vision put forth by Dad and his committee.
Of course, Dad liked a good adventure. He sailed three times from Hawaii to Vancouver, but probably wished he had stopped at two. One adventure I don’t think he regretted was Odyssey 2000, an around-the-world bike tour that started with a parade in Pasadena on the first day of the new millennium. The plan was to cover 45 countries and 32,000 kilometres in one year, and they got most of that done before the organizer ran out of money in October.
I had a FaceTime call with Dad in mid-June. In hindsight, he seemed to be speaking a bit more slowly than usual. By the end of the month, his friends in Lunenburg were noticing it, too. He was a bit unsteady moving around his apartment. He wondered if he had had a small stroke.
But that wasn’t it.
A month of doctor’s appointments and tests and specialists—all while Dad’s condition worsened—led to their conclusion that Dad had a rare brain disease called progressive multifocal leukoencephalopathy. It compromises the myelin that typically protects neurons in the brain. The symptoms are not unlike multiple sclerosis, but this comes on quicker and is neither reversible nor treatable.
That’s how it happened with Dad.
When you’re young, your dad seems invincible. When you’re older, you understand that he’s not. But it’s still hard to square the last few weeks with the image of my 83-year-old dad cycling the roads of Nova Scotia’s South Shore only two months ago.
I just keep returning to the words of that other legendary western gunslinger, William Munny:
“We all got it comin’, kid.”
Rest in peace, Dad. I’m going to miss you.
MESSAGE from JAMESON GREEN, Vancouver BC – read to Gerry on Aug 8
You have and will always be a great inspiration. You are a true professional life legend. Your accomplishments, travels, creativity, work ethic and kind nature have always brought a smile to my face and warmth to my heart.
You have always had a larger than life presence to me. I’ve always looked up to you and appreciate all the advice you’ve shared over the years. I will make you proud as a father, husband, creator and traveller.
You have truly left your mark on this planet in every way a man can. True happiness is becoming the best version of yourself and living your best life. Myself Katja and Aria have become better versions of ourselves because of you.
You are one of a kind. Much Love, Respect and Gratitude.
JAY, KATJA + ARIA
MESSAGE from PEER BARDENFLETH HANSEN – Danish Family – read to Gerry Aug 15
Dearest Gerry
I am grateful for the wonderful life you have contributed to make for me, – I am very grateful and thank you. Throughout our life togetherness, some 60+ years , from swimming and diving at Vancouver Island, to exotic tours in Canada and in Europe, to skiing in northern Italy, you have always been my dearest companion.
All my family members will remember your elegant down slope skiing, – and of course the occasional skis up in the air.
Gerry, I fully respect your decision as made, and the courage it must have taken, – but that is Gerry. We will meet again and I trust you will reserve a seat …
Mette, Gini and I will hold a memorial hour, with a small glass of akvavit on Monday afternoon Danish time. With the dearest thoughts and compassion in a very difficult situation in your life, Judith, stay in touch and please keep us close.
Love from Gini and Peer
MESSAGE #2 by PEER BARDENFLETH HANSEN from Denmark on Mar 21 2023
It has taken us a long while to absorb the sadness and the comprehension that our dear life-long friend, Gerry, is no longer with us. Gerry chose his farewell to life with dignity, respect and honour in the same style that we had the great gift and pleasure to know him through many years.
While as an architect student at UBC, Gerry came to Harmac Pulp Mill near Nanaimo BC employed as vacation assistant, summer 1958. Gerry was assigned to the pulp mill’s quality control department where I worked. Gerry’s very pleasant abilities to communicate with people, his sense of humour and his personality made him a cherished colleague in the department. Through talks during long night shifts, Gerry and I found that we shared a lot of common interests – jazz music, sports cars, and scuba diving. The latter lead to the sharing a lot of our free time together. My Triumph TR3 had long seat adjustment rails, allowing space for Gerry’s long legs in the driver’s side. And scuba diving in the crystal clear waters off Vancouver Island, harpoon fishing, including Gerry’s favorite – wolf eel hunting.
Double dating was a trend at the time. Gerry’s father Norman was generous to lend his suitable Pontiac for the purpose, when Gerry and his first wife Janet, my newlywed wife, Gini, and I went out together.
With Gerry’s enthusiasm for his architectural studies was obvious that he had landed on the right shelf. It was fantastic on several occasions to meet his fellow student colleagues, whom undoubtedly saw Gerry as their role model. The intellectual environment and fellowship created by Gerry and his colleagues encouraged my change from pulp mill work towards a future education. In 1961 Gini and I left Canada when I commenced study naval architecture in Denmark, my home country.
After his graduation from UBC 1963, Gerry and Janet came to live and work in Denmark. Gerry was employed by a prominent Danish architect office, domiciled north of Copenhagen. With his Scandinavian heritage, Gerry was quick to pick up basic Danish language. My young wife Gini and I had returned to Denmark a couple of years before and the four of us spent much leisure time together. Janet and Gerry’s first son Torben was born in Copenhagen October 1965.
After Gerry’s return to Canada and then to University of Michigan and back to The APRA Group in Vancouver, our communications were for a period rather sporadic, however maintained through our common cherished friend, Nicholas Bawlf who was Gerry’s architect student colleague.
Meanwhile, I had commenced an international career as a naval architect. Upon completion of a new building project in Japan, summer 1995, Gini and I took the long return back to Europe, stopping in Vancouver BC. During that 30 year period, Gerry and Janet were divorced and Gerry was now married to Judith Carey. It was a great and pleasant experience to meet the two together. That meeting in Vancouver became a new foundation for a future lovely relationship, still lasting with the great and warm person, Judith.
After Judith and Gerry’s move to Lunenburg NS, our relationship became even closer with exchange of visits across the Atlantic ocean. The two western Canadians had truly adopted their new home place in the east. Gerry was deeply involved with Lunenburg town and harbour matters and his interest in the waterfront buildings and Battery Point Lighthouse is well known.
Judith had a fantastic ability to arrange road trips for us in the beautiful Canadian eastern provinces. To Gerry’s and my great satisfaction, the trips would normally include stop-overs in villages with micro-breweries. To share Gerry and Judith’s profound pride and knowledge of the history and culture of this part of Canada was a great and memorable experience. Gerry’s family roots to British Columbia also took us back to this beautiful part of Canada.
The travels with Gerry and Judith in Europe included selected tours to France, Germany, Austria, Spain, Czech Republic, Greece, and Italy. Each tour remains in the memory with cultural experiences, fun, testing of local gastronomy with accessories, and of course with Gerry’s valued explanation of the special architectural style presented in the various places.
To the very great satisfaction of my family members, mainly the grandchildren, Gerry was a keen skier. On numerous occasions he joined us for the annual trip to the Dolomites, northern Italy, always resulting with great memories. With his tall figure, Gerry mastered the ski slopes with elegant long curves, usually remaining upright. The occasional reason for assistance to “Uncle Gerry” was always available from one of the kids. An on-the-spot recuperation would normally include a well-deserved and always pleasant stop for an espresso and grappa in one of the slope cafes. Unfortunately, Gerry’s shoulder injury 2016 and then COVID prevented the further enjoyment of his company on these family occasions.
With his integrity, morality, and dignity, Gerry was truly a mensch. It has been an honour to have had Gerry’s friendship. He is dearly missed and will always be remembered by us and our family members.
With sincere love and condolences to Judith and to Torben and Erik with families. We will always retain the much cherished friendship to Judith.
MESSAGE & CARD from NANCY COLE VAN RANDEN – Surrey BC – read to Gerry Aug 12
Hi Gerry
Judith may have said that this is Nancy and that she will read my message to you.
Words are hard, but from my heart you are always the taller, older cousin, that has literally known me my whole life.
So over my 60 years we have spent a significant amount of time together, in a number of places, often in Burnaby. For that you are my most special cousin and I want you to know how important you are to me, to my family, and how you held a special place in mom and dads hearts.
I have always admired you, looked up to you. I loved how you always did such interesting things, the ways you kept active, and busy. Dewey and I liked to sit and talk with you and Judith. The conversation was good, the company was very good, a few times we shared some wine. To be honest we saw a lot of nice qualities in you and in Judith, and this leaves a lasting impression on us as a couple.
You left a lasting impression on my as your little cousin Gerry. I appreciated how you loved Mom and Dad, and kept them in your life. They really valued your company. How Judith became a natural part of our family, it was special when you were staying at their house and we could all visit at the nook. I learned a lot from you, about staying educated, and to travel, and to follow your dreams, and to be willing to try something new.
May this time hold some peace, that you are comfortable. I know you are at home with Judith and family, and love, and support.
I will miss you, we will miss you, you are loved.
Nancy, Dewey and family
MESSAGE from DAVID COLE – Lower Mainland BC – Aug 2022
Susan and I are so sorry to hear the news about Gerry. We read the email you sent to Nancy so we are up to date with everything. I have such good memories of Gerry throughout my childhood and beyond and always looked forward to seeing him when the opportunity was there.
Susan as well took an instant liking to him and we are so sad with everything.
We send our love and good thoughts your way, and if there is anything we can do at all at anytime please let us know. we love you both, We are heartbroken.
MESSAGE from JANICE COLE – Burnaby BC – OCT 2022
MESSAGE from SUE OLLIVER, Lunenburg NS – Sep 4, 2022
After a 7-day race across Canada, Steve and I arrived in Lunenburg on the day before Gerry left us.
It was a comfort to us that he looked as he always did, and seemed to be resting peacefully. We held his hand and talked to him about shared memories. We read him messages from friends and loved ones and we tried to relay the measure of our feelings – to describe the place he held in our lives and our hearts. The words did not come easily and each one we considered seemed trite and insufficient. With so many memories and emotions fluttering at the edge of your mind at this momentous time, where do you find the words? And how do you settle your mind enough to catalogue a loved one’s place in your life?
For the past 2 weeks, we have been living in the space Gerry created – that lovely apartment over Kinley’s Drugstore on Lincoln Street. Lofty ceilings, bold artwork on every wall and shelf, bespoke cabinetry, and sleek chairs and light fixtures by designers whose names I don’t recall, but whose importance in the world of design is legend … all of these things are Gerry.
Then there are the hobbies. Cycling was a great passion throughout most of Gerry’s life. A good portion of the art and memorabilia in this apartment concerns cycling in some way, as do the myriad articles of clothing, bike parts and related gadgets. He had wonderful adventures and gathered many good friends through cycling, both in Lunenburg and around the world.
In the room that served as his studio, gym and workplace, the walls are also covered with artwork – his own, along with paintings, etchings, and many interesting artifacts gathered from friends or garnered during his travels. On the shelves of the next room there are dozens of textbooks on architecture and many perfectly scaled models of homes and buildings he worked on during the past 22 years. The collection is impressive, and speaks of the respect he felt for his profession and the significant contribution he made to his town and to many of the people who call it home.
In our 14 years together in Lunenburg, Gerry helped us in many ways … designing a dormer and attic room for our house, renovating our master bathroom, building us a great kitchen island and helping with many smaller projects around our home. His attention to our problems and projects was like a warm blanket – he was a big brother to us in that way, and perhaps to some of the many people who were his friends.
Most would agree that Gerry was quiet and reserved at first, but if he got to know and like you, he would open up and share bits of his life. He might offer a thread of memory from his childhood in Alberta, his university days in Michigan, his travels through Europe in a minivan with his young wife and infant son, or maybe his Odyssey cycling trip around the world in 2000, before he arrived to start a new chapter of life in Lunenburg with Judith and the two of us. During the 14 years the four of us spent together here, we heard all the stories and can definitely agree with his recent comment that he’d “had a good run” at life. We shared a lot of that good run.
Those people closest to Gerry would probably describe him as ‘complicated’. His interest and approval were not easily come by or lightly bestowed, but they meant a great deal when they were. He may have been surprised that his opinion could matter so much, but he was usually willing to consider what was presented and to deliver a measured and honest response … which was never sugar-coated and was sometimes pretty hard to hear. If you weren’t up to accepting his opinion, you learned not to ask.
After eight years living on the west coast, Steve and I have come back to Lunenburg to stay. As we walk along the streets of this small town, we are constantly reminded of Gerry by the many projects and buildings that received his attention in some way over the years, and by friends who stop to reminisce. So much of him is here that as we walk along, we expect to see his head bobbing above all the others, perhaps topped with a hat from his signature collection.
We sadly miss Gerry’s physical presence, but we know that he lives on for us in all of the things that he has focussed his time and attention on in this town, in this apartment and in our lives. And we will recall the stories that he shared with us as we build our new life in Lunenburg with the person who knew him best and loved him most, my sister, Judith.
MESSAGE-CARD from ANNIE & KEN BARNES – Sundra AB
CARD from WALTER & MARILYN CAREY – Langley – Aug 2022
MESSAGE from DIANE HOWE – Surrey BC – Aug 2022
MESSAGE from ED & LYNN PERIH – White Rock BC & MEXICO
CARD from BARNEY SIMPSON, Pender Island BC – Aug 2022
MESSAGE from KIRSTEN ROLFSEN HEATON – California, USA – Aug 17
I was so sorry to see Erik’s and your FB posts about Gerry. I am truly so sorry for your loss.
I have always appreciated your kindness to me, and your efforts to keep in touch over the years. We were never a very close family but Gerry was very important to me and it makes me sad to think I didn’t really express that to him enough. I guess I will have to make do with telling you.
He was always kind to me when we met. I’m sure you know this, but he very generously gave me points to book a flight to Europe when I was in law school – a trip I never could have made without him. It was an amazing experience and I have always been grateful to him for it. I also so appreciated that he came out to help me scatter my dad’s ashes – that was a very lonely time for me and I will always remember that he was there for me.
I hope that we can keep in touch. I’m not sure if you or Erik and Torben will be having a memorial, but if you do, I would love it if you could let me know the details so I can try to be there to honor Gerry. Please take care of yourself.
With love, Kirsten
MESSAGE from JUDY BANKS, mother of KIRSTEN – Salt Spring Island BC – Aug 19
Dear Judith
I was shocked and sorry to hear of Gerry’s death.
I know he will be mightily missed and that he will remain in the hearts and minds of all he touched.
I also know that you will be well supported through your grief and the many adjustments to your life by your family and friends.
Please accept my sincere condolences.
Lots of love, Judy
MESSAGE from TAMMY LAW DAWSON – 100 Mile House, BC – Aug 16
Yesterday morning, August 15th, 2022 at 6:30 am PST, I prepared for my day at work. I removed my wine glass from my bag, and placed it on my desk. Although I began to take on the tasks of the day, my mind was with my Lunenburg cousins, Gerry, Jude and family.
8:30 am: with the rest of the staff present, I played MC Hammer’s “Can’t Touch This”, and we all danced as I told the story of how this song was special to me. Gerry and I had danced to this song at Cousin Carol’s wedding. Gerry extended his behind, slapped it, and said “Can’t Touch This” on queue. I followed, and soon, everyone on the dance floor did as well. The song ended with cheers and hugs. It was awesome!
9:53 am: I walked to the empty lunch room at my place of work, and, with tears in my eyes and a wavering voice, sang “The Teddy Bears’ Picnic”. I pictured Gerry and my mom, arm in arm, singing this song together at a past reunion. Of course, my mom loved Gerry, but this gesture put him on a pedestal! She mentioned it many times after.
9:56 am: I heard a soft ringing in my ears – my sign that someone is delving into my psyche. It gave me great comfort to think that perhaps it was Gerry letting me know that all is well. I raised my wine glass, and my colleagues their coffee cups, and we honoured my cousin, Gerry. I spoke silently to him, told him how special he is, and wished him a wonderful journey.
Years ago, Gerry and Jude gave me a framed, black and white picture of a village in Santorini. It is stunning, and of course, hand-drawn by Gerry. It is a cherished keepsake, along with the many Christmas cards he and Jude created together over the years. A very talented man, with great taste, a wonderful sense of humour, and a kind soul. We will miss you, Gerry!
With much love, Tam and Scott Dawson
MESSAGE from RYAN CAREY – Lower Mainland, BC – Aug 17
I always remember Uncle Gerry as a kind, soft spoken man. When he had something to say it was definitely thought through. One memory I would like to share that I will always remember of him was his love of biking. We were having a family get-together at our house in Aldergrove, probably one of many birthday parties. LOL
Uncle Gerry decided to ride his bike from downtown Vancouver to Aldergrove and we all thought that was crazy and started to guess how long it would take him.
I was quite young at the time so when he arrived I was amazed and in awe. I thought, “He must really like biking”. Made me think quite a lot. Do what you love!
Blessings, Ryan
CARDS FROM DYKE SISTERS (JC cousins)- Lumby BC
